Dear Reader,

We are nearing the end of the Kickstarter and I have not done a good job of explaining exactly what's going on with this game.

Who's surprised?

Unfortunately, Becca (that's me) has a habit of just saying, "here's the thing... have it or don't... up to you," and then later, I get reminders from people that they would be more helped with more information.

So here is some information about what the game itself is about, and what you'll get out of each tier. (And specifically, why I offered them.)

(Oh, and there's still a Dear Becca letter at the bottom, so if you're already sick of the Kickstarter, scroll down to read about getting negative reviews. You're welcome.)

WHAT THE GAME IS

The Energy Pennies game is specially customized to help you gamify your energy production and have a life-long author career. It will include a sticker pack that you can use to customize the game to what drains and saves are the "biggest" for you, and the goal of the game will be to "win" by plugging drains and saving pennies each day. There will also be a booklet that will describe how each of the cards work.

But in addition to the game, I'm also writing the book, The Antidote to Overwhelm for writers, which will only be available through this Kickstarter. This is the only time you'll be able to purchase a paperback copy of the Antidote to Overwhelm book. When the Kickstarter is done, it will get released into the Dear Writer series. So if you liked this cover, I recommend getting the book on the Kickstarter.

The tiers for the "group" workshops will be limited size, so we'll do several calls on that tier. We've had a few questions about timing, and we'll make sure to offer enough options that, if you get this tier, you'll be able to attend something live.

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PERSONALIZED GAMIFIED WRITING PLAN AND CHECK-INS

This is the "almost highest" tier, and that's reserved for the one-on-ones. This is very much a coaching tier, but we'll do a couple of specific things. We'll do some Strengths work on what would create energy pennies for you, and what drains energy pennies for you. And then we'll create a strategy for how to use your energy pennies best, and create a plan from that strategy. (These one-on-ones will be recorded, by the way.)

After you get the plan, there will be "group" check-ins each quarter to keep you on track and provide an opportunity to re-visit the information. These will be scheduled as-needed to keep the groups smaller, to around 15 people.

Who would benefit from this: If you really struggle to understand how to create energy pennies for yourself (especially the drain identification) and you think you would benefit from regular check-ins, this is for you.

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IN-PERSON ONE-ON-ONES OR MASTERMINDS

I've been getting more and more requests to do in-person groups and masterminds. And some of them have been around events I'm already traveling to, so they have been easier. Because I can't afford the time to do every one, I wanted to offer the opportunity to secure a spot on my 2024 calendar.

On the top two tiers, you (or a group of writers) can purchase one whole day of my time, in-person. The versions of this that have worked the best:

• a mastermind of writers who wants me to come and coach the whole group for a day (and likely also do some presenting, topics of your choice)
• a business who wants me to come and coach everyone and do some team-building (we've done this for corporate, non-profit, and entrepreneurs)
• an individual author who wants to make specific and concrete plans for a very demanding year
• a cowriting team who wants to do in-depth work with each other's strengths and with the building of a relationship or friendship

This is a very limited tier (first-come-first-serve), and the total cost is all-inclusive (meaning it includes all my travel and accommodations, including bringing a second coach with me).

We made an international version of this, and a US/CAN version of this. As of right now, this is the only time we're going to offer this option. There's a good chance these will regularly be part of the Kickstarters, rather than offering them as options.

You don't need to use Energy Pennies in this consult if you'd rather not. It can be all Strengths, all the time. Totally up to you. You get to set the agenda for this. (Unless you want me to, and then I can do that, too.)

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I can't promise this is the last time you'll hear more about the Kickstarter, because we're in the last two weeks. Next newsletter, I'll address the #30for30 challenge changes, but I don't want to overwhelm anyone with too much information. For now, I hope this has been helpful to know more about the Kickstarter.

​Here's the campaign page.​

We're nearing the final days. Reply to this email if you have any additional questions. I'm happy to answer them if I can!

<3 Becca <3

Dear Becca,

A while back, I was tagged in a negative review on social media. I’m a person who doesn’t want to look at my negative reviews. I’ll ask a friend or PA or my editor to look at my negative reviews sometimes to see if there are consistent themes of things that are turning off readers, because I do want to continuously get better, but I know myself well enough to know that looking at the negative reviews myself isn’t good for me.

After being tagged in that review, I made the decision to completely leave social media for my mental health. I also blocked that person from having access to me in the event that I went back. I have an assistant who can post for me, so I looked active, but I was completely off of the social media sites that I needed to avoid.

A month or so later, I was gearing up for a new release, and my assistant asked if I’d get back on to be present myself, genuinely, for my reader group.

So, I took a deep breath, waded in, and…

Discovered the person who’d tagged me in the negative review had gotten an ARC of my newest book and was posting about it. Because it was in a group, the “block” didn’t work, and I could see their post. My pulse went haywire and my blood pressure spiked seeing their name, because they’re not a “safe” person to me, no matter what they think of my newer book.

I want to leave social media entirely, but I have a very active reader group that helped me get as far as I have in my career and volunteer admins who help keep everything running. I feel guilty at abandoning the readers, guilty at not being there for the admins, and a related obligation to stay, but also a responsibility to care for my own mental health so that I can keep writing books for years to come.

What should I do? How do I maintain the group I’ve built and show my appreciation for what they do without having to be there at all?

Sincerely,
Conflicted about hating social media

My strengths, if needed: Responsibility, Harmony, Adaptability, Relator, Restorative, Achiever, Futuristic, Connectedness, Intellection, Input

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Dear Writer,

First of all, I'm so sorry about the intensity of that experience. Sometimes, readers make their pain about your writing or your book, and it's really their pain and they need to own it, but can't. I'm sorry you had to pay the consequences for that. Negative reviews (especially really mean ones) are a sign of a personal issue, not a signal about the book itself.

Second, amazing use of your Responsibility Strength to see that you needed the break for your mental health. That’s taking the responsibility to yourself seriously, and that’s such high-level Responsibility work. So, already, you are nailing it.

If you haven’t heard me QTP the need for authors to be on social media before, let me start there. Absolutely, social media can be an effective strategy for growth if you’re good at it (and it seems that, earlier in your career), you were, and potentially are still, good at it. So it’s served the purpose it needs to serve. But for most authors, we are on social media because of a fear of missing out.

We’re afraid of what happens if we don’t do social media. And with the combination of conversion metrics being awful and every channel being horribly saturated, social media is less effective than it has ever been.

All social media channels are less effective than they have ever been unless you are a unicorn. And the chances of being a unicorn (where one social media channel is going to make or break your career) are so slim, they’re not worth discussing. Social media is for being social. Readers can be social about our books without us. (Especially if we encourage them to be.)

The good news is, you’ve already done breaks in the past and seen that you can be absent from social media and still grow your reader base. Why is that? Because readers can talk to each other on social media. They can be social, about your books, without you even being there.

There are a couple of options. You can make your page an admin of the group and then someone who has access to your page can post things that you write that you want the group to see. That way, they’re still your words–it’s not really someone else posting as you–but you don’t have to see the people’s responses.

Or you can go in semi-regularly and post-and-leave. But I would do a lot of self-care when you do, and I would prepare for the fact that you might end up losing a day or two to dive-bombing of unsafe people. And I would only go in there strategically. (If it was me, I would not go in during releases, when opinions will be at their height. But that’s also because I don’t respond well to meaningless criticism.)

I would also set up a place where readers can regularly hear from you, where they can’t talk to you. And I would have your mods and admins say something like, “wanna hear from Becca regularly? Join the newsletter,” in the FB groups. So there’s an understanding that you’re going to be writing in the newsletter, but not active on social media. This way, they can’t engage (unless you read the emails, and I wouldn’t read the emails).

But do you somehow “owe” them your presence just because you have been present in the past? No. They are not your friends. You do not have a friendship responsibility to maintain a relationship with them. Absolutely, it’s better if they hear from you in some way, but it doesn’t have to be the way they want it.

There are a lot of people who insist that you “have” to be on social media. But every strategy and every tactic has a cost, and some costs are just not worth paying. It is absolutely not worth paying the cost of your mental health. That is not a renewable resource, in many ways.

Is there a potential that you will feel the impact of not being present as much, on the bottom line? Of course it’s possible. But again, some costs are just not worth paying. This is one of the fundamental pillars of sustainability. All costs have to be worth paying.

For some of us, and for potentially short periods of time, the cost is worth paying. But only you get to decide if the cost is worth paying.

Just to assuage your Responsibility: you do not owe anyone your presence. They pay for reading the book. That’s the only thing you owe them, when they pay you. Everything else is “as available,” and when you’re not available (for whatever reason), you are not available. It’s no use building an empire on unsustainable practices that are eventually going to kill us. We want our careers to be sustainable, over all things.

Thank you so much for asking this question. I’ve seen this come up almost daily in author groups lately. I do believe that BookTok has increased readers’ desire to interact with authors over negative feedback. What might have seemed like “for readers” behavior previously (even as bad as Goodreads was, it was very clearly just for readers) has now become “necessary to respond” with authors. BookTok has been amazing for many things, but it’s definitely contributed to a shift in conversation.

That still does ot mean you owe anyone your presence, your attention, or your response. You are not public property. You are not friends with your readers. They are your fans. That’s a very different relationship, and it changes the rules of engagement.

I wish you all the best, dear writer, and I hope your social media breaks are long, fruitful, and penny-making as can be. :)

<3 Becca <3