It's time for Strengths for Writers cohort to start up again next week, so if you've been waiting to take it, we've got spots open for you!

And speaking of which... we've been teasing a Strengths cruise for a long time... and now we're ready to announce, it's here!!

Here's just a sample of what will be happening on that cruise.

• Workshops on Strengths--we'll pick together what we want to talk about--on the Sea Days
• A low-tech or no-tech experience (which means most of the time, we'll be no-phones or recording devices and no-computers in the workshops). I'm very excited about this. About being fully present together with our learning, without the interference of technology. (We will record parts of workshops that Becca delivers for the cruise participants.)
• Writing times set aside and encouraged (Becca won't be doing the offshore excursions, so we'll set up camp somewhere for writing times if you want to join)
• A special wedding surprise, since this will be in close proximity to our wedding
• A keepsake specific to this particular cruise

We made a special channel on the BFA Discord if you want to find a roommate before you sign up. There are still several people who are looking, in all the room types (it looks like), so please do check it out.

​Or if you want a single room, you can sign up here.​

We'll be taking off out of the LA port (I think the official berth is Long Beach). And going on Carnival, to the Mexican Riviera. (More info on the link above.)

Who should do this:

If you want to rejuvinate yourself in the new year for new publishing and writing challenges.

If you want to connect with other authors in person who are Strengths focused.

If you're longing for a conference experience that's not specifically marketing and business focused.

If you're excited to deep dive into your Strengths and haven't done that as much in awhile.

If you're hoping to spend some quality time with Becca or other Becca-adjacent Strengths-focused people.

If you like the focus of Strengths and are hoping to jump in more in 2027.

If you just need to get away with some other writers.

This is the place for you. I hope you join us.

And now, without further ado, let's get into a Dear Becca letter about intuition. Spoiler alert, there's going to be more intuitive writing content coming from me in the near future, so I hope you enjoy this one!

Dear Becca,

I’m on my 4th book of yours, DW, Are You Intuitive? I’ve been coming to some of these realizations lately and this book has really hit my sweet spot and it’s helping me figure myself out. I’ve been surprised at where fall in the spectrum of intuition, especially with how I seem to write- not what I expected, but are helping me make sense of things. And thanks for the discussion on overwhelm…(I’m working through the videos.) I've been finally figuring out “the right way”/“the normal way” is not my way and forcing it has probably been giving me my overwhelm and the writers block I’ve been fighting with as I’ve tried to get back to writing after a big life interruption break.

I’m an over thinker with perfectionist tendencies. I’ve said many times “I wish so badly to be a plotter”, but it never works for me. I’ve tried the “write every day thing” many times (and I hate journaling and find it isn’t really my thing, but I’ve tried it and so much more). After working through a lot of your stuff and starting to figure out more of myself and try to figure out what my “style”/“process” is… I’m starting to think I have an intuitive overwhelm problem where my own intuition is dumping me into overthinking which is dumping me in to overwhelm and then I get to “deer in the headlights” mode and freeze up entirely. Or spin my wheels and go no where.

I can write 20-50,000 words in a month- trying to follow my intuition and figure things out as I go. (I’ve been learning from your materials that I think I’m a character driven story person, so it takes me longer and many more side roads to figure things out because I’m learning on the way. Even if I try to spend time (& lots of words) trying to pre-figure put my characters. What I’m not doing is progressing in my stories…. I feel like I keep coming up with more questions than answers or direction- the words come, the questions keep coming, the story doesn’t…self induced overthinking overwhelm. I also seem to have issues with working on just one idea at a time. One of my gifts and it might be an issue with my writing overwhelm probably falls into your “systems” category… I seem to pick up lots of data and figure out how it all fits in to big picture stuff and I can see big picture stuff and find individual things that can be tweaked to make a better fit or process. Once I’ve figured something out I can spin it all over into different scenarios and things.

So this is all the long way of me trying to get to…. How can an intuitive with overthinking overwhelm get over themselves to help their characters and stories get over themselves and get something progressing and done. Deer-in-the-headlights is no fun it makes me feel like a slacker-loser that is fighting between taking on and saving worlds (metaphorically) and wanting to curl up in a fuzzy blanket in a cavey-hole somewhere and hide? Yes, I feel nuts even trying to explain all of this.

- Penny

Dear Penny,

First, thank you for writing this. You are not alone here. And also, I know it's a lot to be feeling this way. I'm hopeful that what I'm going to say this morning will be both helpful for you, and helpful for a lot of people, because I think it will.

I'm going to address a few things here: intuition and the intuitive process; multiple books at once; core drive.

Let's start with core drive. One of the reasons I'm getting more into Enneagram lately is how it addresses these core drives we have. This is something beyond Strengths. It's deeper and more emotional--more visceral, I think. It's something I've been looking for ways to address in writers for a long time, but the Enneagram has done the best job, in my opinion.

But it doesn't have to be Enneagram we use to get there, because the feeling that's produced is the same, no matter how we use words to describe it. It's the feeling of I want this thing so bad, I feel like I'll die if I don't get it.

Biologically, we need safety and security in order to calm that drive down. (It's why in the Maslow's Heirarchy, the baseline needs are all about "am I ok right now, in this moment" and cover food, shelter, security.) But what happens when our core drives are in threat-mode... we think things will take away that biological safety that won't take it away. We think, unconsciously, "if I don't finish this book perfectly, it will kill me." We think it for many reasons (I can't get into all of them in one letter, but I talk about them more in the Energy Management book--which used to be the overwhelm book). But it's important to note that none of the reasons are justified.

Not that we shouldn't be scared. It's fine to be scared.

Our bodies shouldn't be confusing "finish the book" with "life and death." That's the mismatch. Our bodies don't know that not finishing a book right now is safe. It won't kill me. That's the piece we need to understand before what I'm going to say will make sense.

There's something you want (a core driver) more than you want anything else. This "core drive" is deep in you, and it feels like it's being threatened when you don't know what you're doing, or when you don't know what decisions to make, or when you don't know if you're doing it right or not. And as much as, yes, we want to address the decisions and the knowledge, the higher order problem is that you feel biologically unsafe. (And you're not always aware that's what you're feeling.)

But there's a childhood coding there somewhere, reminding you that if you are embarrassed, it will feel like dying. Or if people disapprove of you, it will feel like dying. Or if people control you, it will feel like dying. (There are lots of different things we can want "the most" and when those things are threatened, our bodies react as though it's life and death.)

This makes it very hard to listen to intuition. This is when fear becomes louder than intuition.

If we want to be really in touch with our intuition, we have to prioritize remaining physically regulated, in our bodies, so we always have the safety and security to make decisions without fear bring present. (And listening to our fear becomes less likely.)

But if we don't have a lot of skills to acquire that safety and security (or if we have certain personality types that rely on external security in order to find inner stability), then it can become more of an imperative to heal what we can of those internal childhood echoes. You can do that through Internal Family Systems (IFS) therapy. You can read books like Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents, or How to Do The Work. But what we can't do is nothing.

If we consistently experience issues with fear overtaking security, there are steps to take to find more stability. And I'd always like us to take those steps, so we can more consistently find security in our day to day lives.

And yes, I can't ignore the systemic issues, as well. Having enough money, having physical health, having relational security. All those things aid in us feeling secure. So if you need to pick one of those (not by writing books to get more money, but by addressing either expense/outflow of money, or by asking for a raise or by doing other things to make money), that's also a good thing. Just don't neglect the internal security piece.

(Just on the off-chance that perfectionism is coming from being a 1 Enneagram... I always recommend Claire Taylor for help there. It's very difficult to curb the internal pressure when you're a One. So if you're able to get support there, I would.)

Now, about the multiple books. If you tend to be a Wardrobe archetype (where you have to dive deep into a world in order to be present enough to write the books), then I wouldn't try doing multiple books at the same time. I would try to clear the decks so you can dive deep into one project. But if you're not a Wardrobe, and you can jump between projects more easily, I would try limiting your social media and online time, and see if that helps. (The thinking overwhelm is made worse by scrolling.)

Intuition and the intuitive process... this is such a complicated topic.

It's very difficult to map out the intuitive process, because almost everyone does this slightly differently. But what I can tell you is, it won't come with a natural amount of security. By nature, intuition is inaccessible to consciousness. It takes a lot of time to figure out why you chose the things you chose, when intuition is in charge. You have to wait for the data to reveal itself.

Practicing trusting intuition is a process. So here's a shorthand:

Intuition speaks. Fear worries.

Intuition=period. Fear=question mark.

Intuition knows. Fear wonders.

When you know something, even if it's just an inkling, I want you to trust it. Trust the inklings. Trust the knowing. Even if it feels small at first. As you start to trust it more, it will become louder. (And also, intuition can be wrong... it isn't right 100% of the time. That's not the point. Nothing is right 100% of the time.) So we don't judge intuition by whether or not it was right. But by whether or not it made a statement. You hone your intuition by trusting it. Not by making it prove itself.

Okay, I think I've covered everything I set out to cover in this letter, and clearly, there's a lot more to this conversation. So let's say, this is likely going to be the focus of a digital workshop we do in the Fall. I think it's time.

I hope this was helpful!

<3 Becca <3

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